69 Crazy Things To Do In The Mall

Wednesday June 30, 2004


69 Crazy Things To Do In The Mall


  1. Walk in a single-file line, in step with the person in front of you.
  2. When you come to the benches in the middle of the mall, walk on top of them instead of going around them.
  3. Ask the salespeople in the stores where the uniforms they wear are sold in the store (for example, in Bath and Body Works ask where you can buy their vests)
  4. Ride a hobby-horse around the mall, holding the reins and yelling, “Whoa Betsy!”
  5. Talk in third person at all times.
  6. Carry a Pez dispenser and offer strangers a Pez.
  7. Wear camouflage and sneak around like you think no one can see you.
  8. If the loudspeaker comes on, tell the voices in your head to shut up.
  9. When asked if you need help continue yelling out “WHAT?!?!”
  10. Wear a fake sheriff badge and carry around a stack of post-it notes writing up tickets and warnings to people walking down the mall.
  11. Randomly throw temper tantrums.
  12. Walk 5 ft. behind someone at all times. When he/she enters a store wait at the entrance of the store until he/she comes back out.
  13. When walking, walk in a perfectly straight line, only turning at 90 degree angles.
  14. Add “ong” to the end of every word you use when you speak to the salespeople.
  15. In every store you enter that is not a department store, ask where the lingerie department is.
  16. Be a still model in a store that doesn’t sell clothes.
  17. Accuse someone of stealing your bag.
  18. Go in 579 and ask for size 13.
  19. Skip or gallop wherever you go.
  20. Say punctuation out loud. For example, say, “Ma’am comma would you please help me find a pink comma red comma and blue shirt question mark?”
  21. At all times pretend to have an imaginary friend. When asked if you need help begin by gesturing to the air next to you and saying, “Well, my friend here…”
  22. Go in a store with a friend who pretends to be deaf. Ask the salesperson if he/she will help your deaf friend find the right clothes while you go to the bathroom.
  23. When in the bathroom stall suddenly exclaim, “Corn! When did I eat corn?”
  24. Wear a motorcycle helmet and have a bike lock. Pretend to park your motorcycle when you enter a store.
  25. Carry a tablecloth and picnic basket. Order take-out at the Food Court and spread out you tablecloth in the middle of the mall and enjoy your meal.
  26. When asked “May I help you?” bow or curtsey.
  27. Walk up to someone you don’t know and pretend to know them. Continue for as long as you can.
  28. Take a tootsie pop and hold it like a microphone in a person’s face. Ask him/her how many licks it takes him/her to get to the center of a tootsie pop.
  29. Ask a passerby to scratch your back for you. If they do, make obscene noises when they do so.
  30. Try to get everybody in line to do the Chicken Dance.
  31. Go with a friend. Join yourselves together with one of those things parents attach to their children’s wrists.
  32. If you’re a female, drag your purse behind you. Pull on it and pat your leg, saying “Hurry up old boy!”
  33. Ask the cashier if you could ring your purchase up.
  34. Ask if they accept credit cards and then pay cash.
  35. Bargain
  36. Barter
  37. Carry a rubber ducky with you. Pet him, talk in a baby voice to him, and set him down gently on the counter when you pay.
  38. In the food court ask if this seat is taken and then walk away.
  39. Carry around a can of EasyCheese. Randomly ask people, “Would you like cheese with that?”
  40. When walking down the center of the mall point at nothing and start laughing hysterically.
  41. Put down every store loudly as you exit by saying, “THIS PLACE SUCKS!”
  42. Take a baby doll with you and ask bystanders to baby-sit while you try on clothes.
  43. Constantly move your mouth as if you were talking.
  44. Sing opera-style everything you would normally say.
  45. Ask the Dollar Store if they have a lay-away plan.
  46. Buy one jelly bean at the candy store and have them weigh it.
  47. Take a Big Wheels and wear leather.
  48. Be very hostile when someone asks to help you.
  49. Walk in a weave (crossing each others path), this keeps strangers away, the more the better! Also, yell at those things that people put money in, and take the money out.
  50. Go in a store and ask a lot of question about one product. In the middle of the explanation, walk out.
  51. Buy a new bathing suit and swim in the fountain
  52. Bring a bunch of pants in to the dressing room. Come out later and tell the salesperson none of them are leak proof.
  53. Ask if a particular saw cuts through bone.
  54. Get on the first step of the stairs, wait, and tell other people the escalator must be broken.
  55. Ask the cashier if they take pesos.
  56. Ask the sales person in the pet store if gerbils come in bulk and if they have much white meat on them.
  57. Ride the elevator all day.
  58. Buy a bunch of clothes. Return them later, and when the salesperson asks why, say “they didn’t look good on my dog”
  59. Come in to the drug store looking depressed. Ask if they have over-the-counter prozac.
  60. Stay in the magazine store all day and read the magazines cover to cover.
  61. If you are a guy, go in to a women’s clothing store, and bring dresses into the dressing room with you. Come out, and in you’re most feminine voice say “they just aren’t me”
  62. Do cartwheels down the main part of the mall.
  63. Wear sunglasses, carry a cane, and set up a pot in front of you that says “help me, I’m blind” see how much money you can get.
  64. Test all the mattresses and beds.
  65. Go to sleep in the bed display at department stores. Stir and snore when people walk by.
  66. Ask to hold one of the dogs in the pet store. Let it escape.
  67. Go into Pier 1 and ask if they have any big pieces of junk made of straw.
  68. Knock over displays.
  69. Rock back and forth slowly in front of a security camera.
  70. . Ask to see the manager and introduce yourself as an inspector with the State Board of Health.

Posted 6/30/2004 at 1:36 AM


Wow, it’s amazing how many of these things i have done.  Being bored and living behind the mall… whew…


Posted 7/2/2004 at 1:46 AM by whatthehellsgoingon



Wednesday June 30, 2004
[1] Who cares?
[2] Did you just fart or is that my feet?
[3] What’s the square root of pi?
[4] Which came first, the chicken or the mcchicken sandwich?
[5] What do you think of you?
[6] What’s the fondlest memory you have of me?
[7] are we both going to die in a blazing display of guns and violence?
[8] Do you love PAIN?
[9] Who’s the man?
[10] Would you hug a cactus?
[11] Would you kiss me? please?
[12] Would you have crazy dirty motel monkey sex with me? (again, please?)
[13] Are we distant?
[14] Emotionally, what stands out about your mom?
[15] Do you wish I was cooler than your mom?
[16] On a scale of 1-10, how rad am me?
[17] Give me a nickname and explain why you just picked your nose and ate it.
[18] Am I lame?
[19] How long have you known PAIN, SORROW and DESPAIR?
[20] Describe me in one obscene metaphor.
[21] What was your first impression of the film “The Piano?”
[22] Do you still think that way about The Incredible Hulk movie?
[23] What do you think my greatest weakness is in bed?
[24] Do you think I’ll get chained to a rock for the sea gods to consume me as a sacrifice?
[25] What about you makes me happy?
[26] What about everyone else makes you sad?
[27] What reminds you of a pile of old newspapers on fire and burning green from the ink?
[28] What’s something you would change about something?
[29] How well do you know the official rules of nude full contact co-ed foosball?
[30] Ever wanted to tell me something but couldn’t remember when you finally found me?
[31] Do you think I would kill someone?
[32] Who would oyu like me to kill?
[33] How much would you pay me to do it?
[34] Depending on who it is, I might do it for free.

Posted 6/30/2004 at 1:15 AM


[1] Who cares?  uh, john ashcroft.
[2] Did you just fart or is that my feet?  it would be MY feet.
[3] What’s the square root of pi?  one point osmehting or other.
[4] Which came first, the chicken or the mcchicken sandwich?  neither.  she came first and i kept going for a bit.
[5] What do you think of you?  um, i’m ok i guess.
[6] What’s the fondlest memory you have of me? i haven’t fondled you.  yet.
[7] are we both going to die in a blazing display of guns and violence?  i hope so.
[8] Do you love PAIN?  i live in a world of PAIN!
[9] Who’s the man? me.
[10] Would you hug a cactus?  only if it was horny.
[11] Would you kiss me? please? perhaps.
[12] Would you have crazy dirty motel monkey sex with me? (again, please?)  you got it wrong on ym page.  the motel isnt dirty, the sex is.
[13] Are we distant?  halfway between here and there (an rxb song!)
[14] Emotionally, what stands out about your mom?  um, she used to take these purple pills and i think i got my fuckeduppedness from her.
[15] Do you wish I was cooler than your mom?  nobody is cooler than my mom but me.
[16] On a scale of 1-10, how rad am me? me am ultra rad.
[17] Give me a nickname and explain why you just picked your nose and ate it.  i didn’t.  it was a scratch and then i had a piece of green jelly that happened to be stuck on my nose as well.
[18] Am I lame? i am.
[19] How long have you known PAIN, SORROW and DESPAIR?  a few years now.
[20] Describe me in one obscene metaphor.  um, retards humping a doorknob whilst fellating burlington cops.  for money.
[21] What was your first impression of the film “The Piano?”  never saw it.  HA!
[22] Do you still think that way about The Incredible Hulk movie?  why and how did the guy who directed “crouching tiger, hidden dragon” get the hulk movie to direct.  more to the point, why and how does he htink it is at all kosher that the biggest battle in he film takes place between the hulk and a POODLE in the tops or a REDWOOD FOREST GODDAMMIT!!!???!!!
[23] What do you think my greatest weakness is in bed?  um, form what i hear an inablility to reach climax.  or something.  i wouldnt know.  yet.
[24] Do you think I’ll get chained to a rock for the sea gods to consume me as a sacrifice?  like casseopoeia, word up.
[25] What about you makes me happy?  “the horse anatomy”  oh, wait.  nevermind.
[26] What about everyone else makes you sad?  ignoramitus and sheeplism and shasta (the ex, nto the soda.  i still like the soda).  dammit.
[27] What reminds you of a pile of old newspapers on fire and burning green from the ink?  i burned whiskey one time and people got mad at me for it.
[28] What’s something you would change about something?  everything.  and stuff.
[29] How well do you know the official rules of nude full contact co-ed foosball?  i invented the sport, silly.
[30] Ever wanted to tell me something but couldn’t remember when you finally found me?  no.  who are you?
[31] Do you think I would kill someone?  maybe, but i would probably do it first.
[32] Who would you like me to kill?  um.  i dunno.  yet.
[33] How much would you pay me to do it?  in money?  or other ways?  it depends.
[34] Depending on who it is, I might do it for free.  sweet.

make sure this gets spread around, it is IMPERATIVE that we counter the evil virus-like quiz that i made this to be like.

Posted 6/30/2004 at 2:17 AM by Ithinkyoucanseeherkidneys

[1] Who cares? I do.
[2] Did you just fart or is that my feet?  Probably your feet
[3] What’s the square root of pi?  ~3.14
[4] Which came first, the chicken or the mcchicken sandwich?  Chicken…
[5] What do you think of you?  I’m stupid
[6] What’s the fondlest memory you have of me?  Hmm… That one night… out of breath… heh…
[7] are we both going to die in a blazing display of guns and violence?  HELL YEA!
[8] Do you love PAIN?  Only from you :-P
[9] Who’s the man?  Kirk, because he has a car.
[10] Would you hug a cactus?  Only if it hugs me.
[11] Would you kiss me? please?  I try to…  often as I can.
[12] Would you have crazy dirty motel monkey sex with me? (again, please?)  I thought once would be enough…
[13] Are we distant?  Sort of… right now
[14] Emotionally, what stands out about your mom?  That she is a fucking cunt
[15] Do you wish I was cooler than your mom?  You are WAYYYY cooler than my mom.
[16] On a scale of 1-10, how rad am me?  You iz 10 a rad be.
[17] Give me a nickname and explain why you just picked your nose and ate it.  Bonehead… I was low on salt…
[18] Am I lame?  Only when you can’t get wet.
[19] How long have you known PAIN, SORROW and DESPAIR?  about a year.
[20] Describe me in one obscene metaphor.  Hell’s Angel                                                             [21] What was your first impression of the film “The Piano?”  What the fuck is that?
[22] Do you still think that way about The Incredible Hulk movie?  Yea, it sucked, turds don’t have arms.
[23] What do you think my greatest weakness is in bed?  hmm…  Kinda my fault, but you don’t come.
[24] Do you think I’ll get chained to a rock for the sea gods to consume me as a sacrifice? Yea
[25] What about you makes me happy? Everything
[26] What about everyone else makes you sad?  Ignorance
[27] What reminds you of a pile of old newspapers on fire and burning green from the ink?  butane lighters
[28] What’s something you would change about something?  I would make posers have neon signs implanted on their heads.
[29] How well do you know the official rules of nude full contact co-ed foosball?  Dunno, care to teach?
[30] Ever wanted to tell me something but couldn’t remember when you finally found me?  Yea.
[31] Do you think I would kill someone?  Only this one guy… death by choking on purple dildo…
[32] Who would oyu like me to kill?  a cop                                                               [33] How much would you pay me to do it?  I never had to bay before :`-(
[34] Depending on who it is, I might do it for free.  That’s not a question…


Praise for the worthy, hate for the rest,


Posted 6/30/2004 at 2:50 PM by whatthehellsgoingon





Tuesday June 29, 2004

Monday, June 28, 2004

Well, I don’t really know how I feel right now… Lost, betrayed, fearful? For the first time in my life I am afraid of losing something that I have. It’s quite an odd feeling…

Well, I guess that I was warned. I didn’t listen… I never listen…

I never do anything I guess. I just kind of sit here, chillin out. Maybe that’s why is is so damn easy to take advantage of me.

I dunno, I am just not content to be one out of many.

If some carnie asks you to marry them, go ahead and say yes, just fuck me right up the ass, thanks a fucking lot. Don’t say no because of little old me, the one you constantly insult and degrade. I don’t give a fuck anymore, you can go fuck a kangaroo for all I care.

How could I be fooled so easily? I can’t beleive I thought she actually cared… Who could ever care for something like me?

Humans are a vile, disgusting, race. Not just on the outside, but the inside too. I hope I will never become anything like you. I am truely disgusted to be counted as one of you, as trivial as it may sound.

I am about to vomit all over this keyboard. I feel like shit, I AM SHIT.

I guess people just don’t have any restraint. You’re such a random spontaneous person, go fucking run away to Michigan.

Fuck, I can’t beleive I am wearing this key around my neck. There, it’s off, and I doubt it will ever be on again. I guess there is no such thing as trust.


I think I should just start WWIII. if everything was nuked into the ground, the complexities of modern society would be gone. What was left of the world would be based on co-operation, not pithy fucking issues.

I don’t think I’ve ever been this… Disappointed? I feel sick to my stomache. Everything is blurry… Everything that used to be clear is gone from me. Everything is different… Everything that I used to know is falling apart.

God, everything is so complicated… Why can’t anything ever have just one layer. I should just end it… no… I’ll just stay a loner. I’ve aparently been outkast, abandoned, and thrown away from anything I have ever been to be nice and warm. There is nothing inside of me anymore, it’s hollow… empty… cold… everything is so cold… so cold…

Posted 6/29/2004 at 2:5 AM



No Greater Sorrow



Sunday June 27, 2004
There is no greater sorrow than to recall in misery the time when we were happy.

God whatever is up with my schedule. Its 5:45 am and I’m not asleep. This shit pisses me off… And I haven’t seen Nik in a couple days. I miss him. I Want to see Nik. Ashley and Alex fucked in my bed with I was sleeping IN IT! … Well I didn’t have to use the quarter machine at least… Sorry… Bad Humor… I’m bored… Not on my sleeping schedule… Kerk hasn’t been up to going to Niks so I can’t go visit him… So as you all can tell i’m not thrilled.. .I’m still working on my previous entry about SBD’s its not done yet, but when it is i’ll make it public. Anyway.. until Later…….

2:40pm… I’m Awake…

Mistresstrange (6/27/2004 8:06:35 AM):
consider myself ravished? mkay, hee hee, that is funny that you and mike know each other though…small world…rock on Ha ha, who knew the guy I was there to meet was an ex of yours, he told me you’re only 16, I feel like a dirty old woman giving you my number, hee hee

Ashley came over today. She gave me those guy pants cause they fit me! YEAH! PANTS RULE! I also talked to John today. He’s wanting to get me a cell phone. AWESOME! … yeah! And I found out the the Guardian Of Lightem Isn’t on his side. The Cards were right. How damn awesome is that?
so later in the afternoon I went up to Kerk’s house and Me and Amanda talked him into going to Niks house. FINALLY! I haven’t seen him in so long. It was so good to see him. I guess he was weirded out by the fact that my tounge was green from all the mouthwash I was using last night, so I finally got my kiss. It was so good to feel him hold me again. He mom said 5 minutes. We were there for like over an hour. God I hate his mom. But if it takes dealing with her phyco ass to be with him. Then I say its worth the struggle.

Posted 6/27/2004 at 7:50 AM



Steamboat Days 2004



Monday June 21, 2004
Wednesday, June 16, 2004 Trace Adkins
Ok, I don’t remember WTF happened Wendsday.

Thursday, June 17, 2004 80’s Invasion Tour Featuring:
L.A. Guns / Firehouse / Warrant / Dokken / Great White

If I got my schedule straight, Then Thursday Night was Metal Night. Tons of Metal Bands playing on the south stage. The guys in the ROCK and Roll boutique invited me to hang with them that night, but I had to turn them down for the fact that I had found Nik outside the gate. It was so great to hang out with him. We went to the Drake and ordered some pops. Then using his walky Talky talked to some carnies in a corndog stand. WUZZUPP!!!!!!!! hahaha. IT was so funny, I also got the autograph of the Lead singer of LA GUNS. It was awesome. We caught a ride to my house with Titus. Nik makes me so happy. So perfect. So contented… … … We made love that night. For the first time, I can honestly say we made love. It was the most supreme feeling to ever rush through my body. I was content falling asleep in his arms. He left home the following morning.

Friday, June 18, 2004-Journey
I talked to my dad about peircing my tounge. He was completely Cool with it. I had him talk to Trash. We went to grandma’s and chilled there for awhile because we were bug bombing the house again.Then I made him stop by the house and let me grab a jacket because I had a gut feeling it was going to be chilly again. Dad dropped me off downtown. I met up with the boys at the tent. I got to watch them close up tent. We walked back to their camper. Shitty place it really was, but what can you exspect from three men traveling the road for months on end. I wasn’t nervous about peircing my tounge at all, under Trash started opening all the wrappers. At first I was scared that Jon wasn’t going to be there to keep me company. His presence made me feel better. But by the time Trash had his gloves and needles perpaired, he was sitting on the Bed close to me. It was the clamps that scared me the most. He was about to do it but I bailed because my stomach was revolving inside of me like one of the rides at SteamBoat Days. They thought I wasn’t up to it. But I Did it! I don’t remember the feeling of it going through my tounge at all, so I guess that part hadn’t been too bad. The worst part was having to keep my tounge outside my mouth for longer then I wanted too. The slober and the shock was more then I wanted. I prayed for it to end. They seemed so casual about it. Treating me with no pity. But the best was yet to come. We FINALLY found Jose’. Some Mexican carnie who I take it was the BIG dealer. Or that’s where they(Carnies) all get their smoke. He got us deal, and we went straight to the river. Climbed up on the dock and pop’d a squat. It was so comfortable. Sitting along the riverside with a perfect view of the Burlington Bridge, feeling the waves drift beneath the dock. Sitting with a couple guys, I didn’t even know, smoking and laughing and just (LITERALLY) falling in love with everything they were. If I could confront someone about being punk, or a freak, or whatever the so called stereotype it is today. These were modern day PUNKS. On the go, don’t give a fuck, living life day to day, true Punks. And I envy’d them. I wanted to be them, be with them. Travel the world and just enjoy. Just sit on a dock with some “out of the blue” person and get high, then laugh the night away.I enjoyed myself. I can’t think of any other night in my life where I can think of being so care free and happy. Falling in love with some wandering stranger just because he can moonwalk and blow circles in his smoke. Along the river, the wind grew nippy, so we went inside the camper. Talking, eating, having a few laughs, and it got too late to go home. So I crashed with them. So there I was. Me, sleeping between two extremely sexy, sensitive, rebelious guys, watching them sleep. And for me, it was heaven. Absolute Bliss. I woke up at sunrise. Smiled at there sleeping faces. Left a note so they could exspect to see me again. “I’ll come back For You.” And went about my way. The streets are so beautiful in the early morning. How I missed the sunrise…

Saturday, June 19, 2004-The B-52s***** #
I went to the B-52’s concert with Brandy and Titus. We set up our seats right up close to the fence EXACTLY where I stood during the Trapt Concert. I left my chair by the fence and went to watch The Gibbs Brothers on the other stage. GOD THEY ARE SO HOT. They light up the stage. When I went to sit back at my seat, there was a girl standing between my chair and my fence- the room intended for my feet- so bluntly I said excuse me where she then moved, but when I sat down I still couldn’t see through her so I said with an attitude”YOUR IN MY BUBBLE” and they moved away all together. I mean, yeah, I was rude, but who is so stupid to stand in front of a chair thats sitting there. Plus the fact that this was the B-52’s and there was no way in hell I was gonna miss it. The show ended a lot early’r then it was thought to. Considering the fact that all the other concerts lasted until like eleven or later. I left the concert area and wondered around a bit. Where I ran into Seth Foster. I haven’t seen him in a dogs age. He was hanging out with the Deaf Zach. Who just so happens to have a car. *cheers* So we went crusing cause I needed a cigarette bad and I wasn’t up to getting caught again with another ticket. We drove around for a while and then I got a hair up my ass and decided that since we were on that side of town we should stop by my child lovers house. So off to Nik’s we went. Get there and his mom answers the door. Bitching about how he called her a Fucking Cunt and how he didn’t come home some night a couple nights ago and that he was at his dad’s and how she was planning on sending him away. Like a Christain school or something. So sitting there for about an hour listening to her go on and on about it. Damn how I dispise her. We finally got to leave and stopped out at Stars Cave entrace thingy, jamming out to Queen of the Damned soundtrack. Seth got a call and we picked up his room mate from Ryans and dropped them both at home. Zach took me back to SBD’s Where I then met up with Jon and Trash. Jon asked if I had been avoiding them. I just figured I was being a nusence hanging around there all night. So I invited them to come to my place and chill. We got stoned. It was all good.

– Mina Kaye

Sunday, June 20, 2004-Montgomery Gentry
Slept the day away. I woke up to Kerk asking me if I wanted to go downtown to SBD’s with him and his mom and uncle. That was like Perfect. *Evil Laugh* I didn’t have to walk. I was also in the Newspaper today. Me and my pimp hat. I didn’t get any comments on it tho. How depressing. The first time my picture ever earns its way into the newspaper, and no one notice’s. Damn it. I ran into Brandon. I can’t believe I dated him. No, really I can’t. I don’t think you can even say we dated. The most it consisted of was we exchanged phone numbers, said it wasn’t working, and just had casual converations everytime we talked afterwords. He’s a good guy. I ran into him when I walked down to the Kum and Go. Damn… Kum and Go. That shit is priceless… PRICELESS! We sat on the sign outside the gate for hours. I was hoping Jon Seely could get me in considering the fact that I gave my ticket to Brandy and Titus so one of her friends could go with her to the concert. That was at handle with care, so that fits into the schedule somewhere yesterday. I saw the guy that me and Nik hung out with monday. So I yelled at him to tell Jon that I was hanging outside. Jon came to the door told me to head to the end of fence and he was going to slip his Carnie tag underneath so I could use it to get in. I hung out with them all night. Mike Alter and his new girlfriend was downthere. She was cool, but she could be hotter if she showed off her curves a little more. You can tell she has got some. GO MIKE! yeah! Anyway, and there was some poser girls hanging out there like all night. Some chick with a line over her eye. Wierd. Lacy even stopped in. GoD DamNit! Why do they HAUNT ME SO! Damn the Preps! Damn them All to Hell! Fucking Posers… *Growls* Me and Jon were sitting there laughing at the different types of people that walked in and out of the place. So many preps. There was one chick that came in and she was dressed all hardcore and shit and when we started carrying a convertation. She didn’t even know who Metallica or shit of anyone was. She couldn’t name off half the bands we were playing on the stereo. BUT “She knew who Ozzy Osbourne was” *Prepy Giggle* no fucking lie… She said that and Giggled… She had to end the shit with the damn giggle. … Stupid preps… Well that story could go on and on.. so whatever. I got to help run the store. Telling people the prices of things and standing behind the counter. Jon teaching me so many things and telling me stories of where they have been and what they’ve done. I really enjoyed myself. *FIREWORKS*

TIP JAR ” Feed the Poor Starving White Boys”

The night grew late and the carnval closed down. It was quite an extrodinary experience watching Steamboat Days Grow and Decend all in one week. I got to watch the Concert stage, ferris wheel and the other rides get taken down. And I got to help pack up the Rock And Roll Boutiqute. They gave me lots of free incense for helping out.It was kinda cool how all of what they had fit right into a little truck. They invited me to eat with them at Hungrey Bear. I couldn’t eat anything because of my tounge. Their wasn’t anyway I was gonna risk it. Plus they didn’t have soup and I was already too cool for icecream, so I ordered me a Hot chocolate which really hit the spot. Then he wouldn’t even let me pay. But I got my Serendipity into the world. HA! YEAH!.. I showed them the short cut back downtown. They seemed grateful. From the carnival we walked back up to my place and hung out until the early hours of the morning. When my dad woke up. We all crashed in my bed. I woke up to Jon poking me (No, not with his penis) Just annoying tickling me awake. Ravishly Violated was the way he put it. I myself think it was plain annoying waking up to being tickled. We went into my middle room and talked until we felt it was time to wake up Trash. I didn’t want them to leave. They were the coolest people i’ve met in like …. FOREVER. I made them write there address’s and number’s on my wall. That way I wouldn’t lose it. I’m very good at that. They said their goodbyes and up the hill they went. That was it. I never even got their picture…

Monday, June 21, 2004-
So the boys were gone and that was it. The world appeared empty. No more staying up and out until the early moments of dawn. No more of the endless party that had consumed my week. How empty my life really is on a daily basis. Kerk came down for a friendly hello and said that he was going to visit Nik. Nik thought I was mad at him. No? Why the fuck? I would have made that WELL known and he should know that. haha. Me and my temper. We went and visited. He went with us to Hollow Road Thingy. Something to do with it being Haunted. Some chick fell off a cliff when her husband didn’t show up to their wedding. He got in a car wreck and died so I guess he had good reason not to show. I still would have killed myself too. We also stopped at the warehouse close to where the carnie’s had their campers. Jon and Trash left me a gift. Two Glass pipes. They are so beautiful. Very Elegant looking for a pipe. Kerk dropped me off at Titus’s moms so that I could hang out with Brandy. I fell asleep watching a movie. Stopped by Allison’s Said Hey and told her ALL about SteamBoat Day’s. Went home and Dad and I went Shopping at Wal-Mart for the simple fact that I couldn’t eat anything that I had to chew. I’m Such A pansy. lol. And that was my day.

Tuesday, June 22, 2004-
Kerk Came over tonight and let me Call my mom. Found Out John Willis Put me and my dad on the witness list. So i’m sitting there thinking WTF? I’m not on his side. Then agian. I don’t really want to be on anyones side. Cleaned out my pipe. OMG I have never seen so much damn resin in my life. Alex came over and chilled. And I got plastered. End of story.

Wendsday, June 23, 2004-
Dad woke me up this morning pretty early it felt like. Considering the fact that I stayed up all night chilling with Alex. Dad told me to get ready that we were gonna go work for Kevin today. So its some place out by Timberline. GOD and did it ever suck. I had no clue as to what I was doing. I felt like I was always in the way. Slimfasts just dont cut it anymore, and i CANNOT believe They FUCKING PAINT BATHTUBS! Since when have bathtubs been painted? Cause that was a PAIN in my ass… … … I was having to scrap paint off a fucking bathtub. And the damn thing had Flower imprints in it. Fuck…. We left about two-three o clock.
Went over to grandma’s when they fed me Chinese (OH GOD, real food!) I was thrilled. And took a shower. Then dad was crashed. So then I crashed. And completely missed Larp. Damnit… So I wasn’t thrilled. Then Alex came over again. So all and all… I dont know what to think… Bad Day… Good day… Whatever.

Thursday, June 24, 2004-
Seth came over. I chilled all day and did not a damn thing. Working for Kevin wasn’t as bad as I say it is. I guess its not the labor that bothers me at all. Its the fact that I don’t know what the fuck it is i’m doing, and I always feel im in the way of things. Plus, how is a person supposed to take a piss with a bunch of men working around a person all day. I have to carry my own toilet paper just in case. But I held it all day instead. It didn’t dawn on me until today, but I missed Larp again. For another week in a row. Damn that sucks. But life has gotten too much in the way for it to even click in my head anymore. I’m more worried about my tounge more then anything. It wasn’t so swollen today. I actually ate a subway sandwich. One of the first things I’ve actually eaten since I’ve gotten my tounge peirced. And I can’t get the thought of Jon Seely out of my head. My first marrige proposal. I’d marry him too. I really would.
Just for the simple fact that I have no Idea what I want in life and everything goes to shit anyway, so why not just do one of those spur of the moment things. How I wish I could just run away to him. Not nessacary to run away with him. But just to run away. Not even had known him but a couple days. Run away with him to Michigan and be weird and happy. Weird and Happy…

Posted 6/21/2004 at 2:28 AM



Don’t let Emotions Show

Thursday June 17, 2004
Fuck… Just when you think you have
trained your mind to not let any
emotion show…
SOMETHING FUCKS WITH YOU!How do I loathe thee? Let me count the ways.

I hate the way you talk to me,

and the way you cut your hair.

I hate that you can’t drive a car,

I hate it when you stare.

I hate your big wierd hooker boots

and the way you read my mind.

I hate you so much it makes me sick,

it even makes me rhyme.

I hate the way you’re always right,

I hate that I can’t tell when you lie.

I hate it when you make me laugh,

even worse when you make me cry.

I hate it when you’re not around,

and the fact that you can’t call.

But mostly I hate the way I don’t hate you,

not even close…

not even a little bit…

not even at all.

Yea, yea, I know, I ripped it off, but at least I changed some of it to make it fit into our context. Besides, I’m allowed to rip it off, It’s our movie anyway

Well, lately, my whole world has been turned upside down. It’s been one wild surge of emotions, and sometimes hormones But through it all… there’s been one emotion that has prevailed. I used to not beleive in love at first sight. I used to not think there was much of anything to life. I used to be dumb, and ignorant, and folly. I used to tell someone I loved them, not meaning it for a second. I don’t know why… It was really stupid of me…


Posted 6/17/2004 at 2:41 AM

Yours, Eternally, Nikolicious

Thursday June 17, 2004
OK, So I left around 4 with Saqora, Jon, and Eric, To go to Gene’s Gpa’s house. BUT BEFORE we left guess what happened. SAQORA FOUND ME A RECORD PLAYER!
*Screams like a little preppy girl at a backstreet boys concert*
Anyway, so I walk out the door wearing a skimpy shirt with no bra, but of course thats typical Mina Kaye. I found out we are changing game from Vampire The Masquerade to Werewolf. I think its good cause we really need a change. It was getting so bored there for a while. Anyway, so there we were, in the middle of fucking dead end Egypt. God It was great. And I had Black Berries for the first time. Didn’t know that you could eat them. They were awesome. And I was asking about all the different types of weeds that grow around the area, cause the weeds were really thick. In South Carolina… all we had were Pine Trees. I FUCKING HATE PINE TREES, AND PINE CONES, AND PINE STRAW with a passion. Then again for punishment in South Carolina, my step father would send me out in our two acres of land and make me pick up all the pine cones up with my hands. I only got to use trash bags and a wheel barrow. Never a rake. So yeah… that should explain alot. But the scenery here is so different. I can really tell that I haven’t gotten out a lot within the past year. I didn’t know a Dandelion was a weed… HOW BLONDE AM I? But we had a grill and a bonfire and Larped a little bit. But I caught a ride home early cause I wanted to be home at a decent hour. I watched Treasure Planet with my Dad. That movie is so Pimp. Then, I realize… Hey it pays off to check your email every half hour. Know Why? Read this. Tell me this isn’t priceless… 

Thursday, June 17, 2004 12:03 AM Hey Babe!

I was just thinking about you, and decided to read your xanga. I guess you are having some thoughts about me that we need to straighten out… but not here, not now. In person. I want you to get a hold of me AS SOON AS YOU READ THIS.

Don’t cry anymore. I would do anything for you. I don’t want you to hurt, I want to make you happy. Not sad. I don’t know what my problem was that day. I was freaking out a little bit too much over the cops. I thought they had stopped because they recognized my face or something. Stoner logic at it’s finest!

Don’t shed any tears for me, babe. I’ll be coming home soon. Home to you… Home to where the key fits perfectly into the lock… Home where the walls could come crashing down around us, and neither of us would care, because we have each other… Home, where the heart is, and there is no pain or worry…

Thinking of you always,
Your lover tried and true,
The one that holds the key,

Yours, Eternally,

Ok, so by the end of it I was in tears of Joy. My worst fears always tend to get the best of me. Then agian the fear of being alone scares me more. But I was so happy to receive that letter. And yes, I was literally in tears. Mushy, sad, helpless romantic me, but I just thought it was the sweetest thing I’ve ever recieved.
I have no idea what the plans are for tomarrow, besides the fact, that i’m susposed to visit Jake ( I haven’t seen him in forever) and the concert, and I’m supposed to get in touch with Nik ASAP as you can tell from the letter.

And I saw a Snow Rider for the first time too today! YeAH@!

OH, and personal reminder. Mike A is going to be at SBD’s and he’s supposed to prove me wrong, so i’m supposed to meet him.


PS: OH YEAH… I found out something that really makes me happy… FIREFLIES!

Posted 6/17/2004 at 2:35 AM

I can’t beleive you can be so paranoid… anyway… I’m still online…. I guess you are typing a response or something, I havent gotten anything from you.


Posted 6/17/2004 at 2:2 AM by whatthehellsgoingon

hey if you still want to go to my show, lemme know ASAQ, and let me know when and where to pick you up,  if he’s got money, invite nik too.  and all your friends.  the more ppl show up the more i pay the bands.

ok, later.

ps – what’s with oonly one eprop.  are you stingy today?

Posted 6/17/2004 at 2:57 AM by Ithinkyoucanseeherkidneys
Posted 6/22/2004 at 11:53 PM by whatthehellsgoingon

My Key. My Lock.


I got up this morning. With Nothing inparticular on my mind. Started getting ready about one pm. I was still dwelling on the thought of Nik, and how much he means to me, and that look he gave me in the truck ride home. I rolled up between my covers and cried at my own displeasure. I’m such a weakling. How I wish my emotions were more stable, so that I could stare at the sky and feel the emotion I’m supposed to. Instead of the many mixed emotions that float through my head. I fell asleep there, drowning in my despair at the main thing that means the most to me now. My Key. My Lock. How I worship the ground he walks upon. Lieing in my bed wishing he was beside me… Holding me in his arms that feel so right. So Perfect. Plain Pure Perfection in my eyes. He claims I’m too good for him. Yet, I think otherwise. I think he’s the most meaningful thing to ever cross my path. The most sencere moth to get caught dancing around my flame. I love him so. He makes me happy. So why do I cry. Damn my Borderline. Damn my second thoughts. I wont let them take over this time. My Tarot reading said to be better then my borderline, and to defeat it. It also garenteed, that he’s the one. He’s Mr Perfect, and not to loose this one. Dont’ Let me loose this one. Whatever I do…

I woke up hours later. My pillow wet with tears. Then furious at myself. THE CONCERT STARTED IN 10 MINUTES!

To Be Continued: Its 3:14am. I’ll finish this later.

2:24pm Wendsday-
Ok, Back. I came upstairs Grumpy. My dad continuously asking me whats wrong. Can’t he just realize “I have no Idea whats wrong” I just woke up. Thats about it. But he gave me a ride downtown. And I met up with Skippie (Skid, Jerrod) down at the concert. He’s so nice. He works at the Barn Swallow, But he was so hitting on me the whole time, complaining that he wants me to be he’s “Cuddle Buddy” I’m sorry. But he doesn’t have long hair, and his teeth are destrubing. And he’s 22, so that doesn’t help either, but he’s cool to hang with. We also ran into Officer FOGLE. They guy the wrote me the ticket the night before, so Skid got me on his good side. We sat and smoked right in front of him after that and he didn’t do a damn thing. YEAH!
The Gibbs Brothers Played. OMG they are so … how do you put it… Dreamy. Their Musicians, Have tattoos, piercings, Long hair, and wear eyeliner. How can you beat that. Nice teeth too.. hahaha. They jam out like no other. Me and Skid have that in common. Good taste in music. The Gibbs brothers can actually play compared to have the damn kids in town now a days. GOD they were awesome. Skid Says that I’m cool, for one, he says i’m hot, which is just so, … … i’m so not… , and he says i’m an older generation. I like the actual music. Which I can brag about. I have good taste. HAHA.
The only bad thing was that there was some tall fucker in front of us, who just wouldn’t get the hint. I don’t know how many times I gave him dirty looks or told him that he was tall. Kind of a hint hint, ” HEY I”M SHORTER THEN YOU AND YOUR IN THE FUCKING WAY!” Be considerate you stupid Preps. Thats the least you can do. But by the time Trapt hit the stage, he was gone and we were up close.
Strob Lights and Loud Booms, and the crowd going nutz! The energy was unbelieveable. I couldn’t help but think of Nik and think that he might of half way enjoyed this. Wishing it was him beside me head banging instead of some fucker without any hair. I was so sure he was going to break his neck, then again I admired him for getting so emotional over music. We also stole some alcohol signs that were hanging on the rails… Hey, they buy new ones anyway!
Trapts sounded awesome live. They sounded like they do on the CD which I admire in bands. At least they actually sing rather then lipsink too. By the end of the show, the crowd was wild. I had an awesome view. You could see people in the VIP crowd surfing and trying to mosh, but the pigs where really heavy. They were taking people out of the Pit that were crowd surfing. What party poopers. The end of HEADSTRONG was AMAZING. The sound was so loud I could feel the beats shaking within my body. People Jumping on the railing, Moshing, headbanging, getting really emotional. It was electric. The end came too soon. The Strobes were going off and all I could see was a bunch of hands shooting in the air showing their support.

So the light, and the hands, OMG. I can’t explain thrill.

We left the gig, and walked around steamboat days for a couple more hours. I ran into Jace, Kyle, and Blake. Yeah, I flashed them the previous year at steamboat days, so I guess they are wanting to see boobies. haha Pansies… Still Thrilled by boobs…. Its so great.
Me and Skid and his friend all went to my house and Smoked. My second Night in a row. Skid himself didn’t leave until like 3am. Which I wasn’t too thrilled about. I guess he wanted to “Bond” But I was tired. Which almost caused me to miss my appointment with O Rourk this morning. I called my cousin and she drove me downtown. But I had to walk home, in the heat, Still in my pajama’s, so i wasn’t too thrilled. But Wierd Harolds was having their outdoor CD sale again, so I got me the 10 things I hate about you SoundTrack. (That I love so VERY VERY MUCH) Yeah! and the Puddle Of Mudd CD “Come Clean” … 5 Bucks. I think I got a deal. Well, Someone is supposed to come get me at about 3:30 to take me to a werewolf game. its gonna be a cookout!… HEY! woop!.. lol. Anyway. People. Leave Comments. I like comments…. Except the ones that say ” OMG, YOU SLEPT MY BOYFRIEND BEFORE I EVER DATED HIM” like OMG… Totally.. GAG ME WITH SPOON!

Later Fuckups: – Mina Kaye

Posted 6/16/2004 at 5:21 AM

Violation: Poss. Tobacco Under Legal Age

Tuesday June 15, 2004
Yesterday, I sleep in. AdventureLand had been a really long day, so I slept the day away. I was online, and then watching Digimon (The Movie) and Kerk came over. I gave Nik a call seeing if he wanted to hang out and he got a ride over to my place. I got ready in my little black dress. It was all good. And My PIMP hat, which everyone seemed to love. I got so many comments on it. The whole time I was down there with Nik, he didn’t seemed thrilled. I just wanted to get him a cab and send him home cause I swear… God. He was so bumming me out. I was even gambling, and It wasn’t as fun as it should have been. We met up with one of his friends who turns out to be friends with Brian. Then we went to look for some smoke. Turns out the friend was the guy that called the cops when ERIC KING did that whole bullshit and got me in trouble the first time. As it turned out we went to my house and got stoned. I changed my clothes and we chilled. When we finally got back, i had lit a cigarette and the cops caught me, While being stoned. And it was samn cop that showed up at my house the night the whole eric thing happened.

Defendents Copy (Retained By Defendent)
Iowa Uniform Citation and Complaint
Law enforcement Agency
04-22614 PM

State Of Iowa
County Of Des Moines   No: 29
City Of Burlington Iowa
In The Court At: DM CO. CourtHouse
NAME: Jaeger, Kimberly Kaye
ADDRESS: 225 Summer Street
CITY: Burlington  STATE: IA ZIP:52601
DOB:04/05/88 Race: W Sex: F HT:5-00 WT:114
The undersigned states that on or about 06/14/04 at 9:46pm
defendant did unlawfully
Upon a public Highway at: Front And Market
Located in the county and state aforesaid and did then and there commit the following offense:

Scheduled Vio/Fine: $50.00
Violation: Poss. Tobacco Under Legal Age
Local ORD. 56.02
I certify under penalty of perjury and persuant to the laws of the state of iowa that the preceding is true and correct.

Date: 06/14/04  Officers Sign: Fogle ID#225
CourtDate:If you must appear in court or if you choose to appear to answer a charge which does not require an appearence, report to the above named court on:
06/28/04 at 9:00 am

NOTICE: Providing false information is a violation of section 719.3 of the Code of Iowa and is punishable as an aggravated misdemeanor.

My Signature is not a Plea of Guilty, but acknowledges all of the following:
1: I hereby Swear and affirm that the information provided by me on this citation is true under penalty of providing false information.
2:I promise to appear in said court at said time and place, or I will comply with the provision on the top of the reverse side of the citation.
The following applies to simple misdemeanors only:
3: I hereby give my unsecured appearance bond in the amount of $77.00 dollars and enter my written appearance. I agree that if I fail to appear in person or by counsel to defend against  the offense charged in this citation, the court is authorized to enter a conviction and render judgement against me for the amount of my appearence bond in satisfaction of the penalty and surchange plus court costs.

So yeah, it was my fault (THIS TIME) but fuck em. Oh well. And then by that time Nik was wanting to go home and his friend gave us a ride.  I saw the look in Niks face as we were driving home and I’ve dwelled upon it ever since. Like a second thought running though his head, like he hated me and he had to deal with me until I left the vehicle. Does he want relief from me?

Posted 6/15/2004 at 11:54 AM


hmm.  i think  maybe you should ask him about it when you see him again.  just make sure not to do it on the fone.  that shit never works out.  hopefully it’s just your imagination or something.

Posted 6/15/2004 at 1:36 PM by Ithinkyoucanseeherkidneys
so you did have sex?
Posted 6/15/2004 at 4:41 PM by HotPinkGymSocks