The best way to wake in the morning


He is the best way to wake up in the morning

and his goodbye kisses leave me

longing for his return all day

Right now I couldn’t be happier. I needed this more than I thought. It’s like a clean breeze just washed through my life and took my stresses with it. My obvious emotional state of the month has left me exhausted and overly self-aware , but he has been tender and patient making last night (even with my awkward behavior) another night to top the charts. I swear all my times with him are becoming the epitome of my happiest memories and whats stranger is we don’t even really have to do much. His sweet nothings spark the fire in my heart that leaves me enthralled. I have to agree I’ve never had a relationship begin so well; The positive and calm zen aura of it all.

This year I’m grateful for finally falling in love:

You are every reason, every hope, and every dream I’ve ever had. And no matter what happens in the future. Everyday we are together is the greatest day of my life. You’ve taken a part of me that will always be yours.

 Perfect love is rare indeed – for to be a lover will require that you continually have the subtlety of the very wise, the flexibility of the child, the sensitivity of the artist, the understanding of the philosopher, the acceptance of the saint, the tolerance of the scholar and the fortitude of the certain 

 Leo Buscaglia

On a comical note, I’ve never been this sexually awkward ever. :P Normally I can walk into a bedroom, take full control and be fine. But somehow in the bedroom with my lion, I get shy. I try to take control of my leo and find myself bumping noses or stepping on skirts. And were i know all couples have their own sort of kiss, its like we haven’t figured ours out yet. *giggles* not that it is a bad thing, I find it quite endearing actually. Like even after all this time together it’s still so new and exploratory; figuring each other out. But I find myself needing to know what to do. I have a difficult time reading his responses. Yet, its still the most passionate intimacy bars none. For the first time it’s both my body *And Mind* involved; its made all the difference with both my arousal level and climax’s.

Then last night I slept like a dream. Not one nightmare, just the occasional roll over and hold him. and i woke up early feeling rested and happy. I’m sure the kisses helped. :)


Tuesday August 24, 2004 Follow Your Dreams “Oh, Come On”



Tuesday August 24, 2004
aries horoscope

You might forget where you are at, as you spend so much focus and
time thinking about money issues today. While this is not the best
time to borrow money, it is a great time to look at the long-term
solutions for stability.

I can’t believe how late I always sleep. Its for 4:30 again.
Time for my meds. Amanda was already gone when I
woke up. Watched Nightmare Before CHristmas. It made
me think about Jake. I really wish I had someone here for
comfort. Nik can’t ever be around because of his mom,
and I do apprecitate the efforts that he makes, its just…
Hard I guess. Considering all the Bullshit and conflict
I’ve been having to deal with Lately.  I need the support.
No one has been there as much as I need them. I do
believe I’m dealing with this a lot better then I think I should.
I just keep remembering I have to be strong. Because what
doesn’t Kill You makes you stronger.

Rob stopped by to come pick me up to take me out to the
Barn for Jam night. I took up a bit too much of his time, but
I was still in the waking up phase. Jam night at the Barn was
nice. I was a bit bored at first but I think listening to music for
hours on end really helped me to clear my mind cause all I did
was think. I did wish I had something to doodle on, But over
all I enjoyed myself. Got out of the house. Got to spend time
with Rob which is always good. And I FINALLY bought that
DueRag That I’ve been wanting forEVer. And Rob’s friend
also let me play on his drums which I greatly apprecitated.
And I met Jeff who was very nice and interesting to talk to
except the fact that he said I should stop smoking and was
telling me continuously to follow my dreams…. Oh come On.
Be realistic. I’m never going to be anything then at tops a
house wife, and or die alone…. with no career… No life.. and
no real accomplishments… Why try to put such bullshit in my
head and make me believe I could be something, when the
world would never offer me the chance. My nite was all well
really. I still think I suck at the drums…

——> Mina, Allison, And Mike…
Playing Dress Up with the Camra… Cheap EnterTainment…

Posted 8/24/2004 at 5:36 PM